Personal Creations provided this beautiful you are my happily ever after canvas to help D and I focus on our relationship this year. I hung it over our bed to provide a lovely visual reminder that we need and want to continue to work on our relationship every day.
It’s hard to believe that D and I are coming up on 20 years of marriage this year. We were young – junior high young – when we met. We knew in high school that we were going to get married. What we didn’t really know at that point in time is how much work goes into building that happily ever after relationship.
We had some ups and downs when we were dating due to outside influences, but we learned how to talk through our problems. We faced adversity, hardship, grief, and separation before we got married, so we weren’t going into marriage thinking it was going to be easy. We were confident that we’d be able to handle whatever was thrown our way if we tackled it together.
One thing we learned early on was that we needed to have open communication and make sure we have time together. We didn’t always have loads of time together due to schedules and D’s military career, so we had to make the most of our time together. We strove to have quality time together and remove as many outside distractions as possible.
Looking back at those early years, I remember how I tried to find every opportunity I could to spend extra time with him. Some of that changed a little over time as I had to balance life with a child, but we still made our relationship a priority.
Last year, I took up climbing to spend more time with D. This year, I head over to meet him at the climbing gym during his lunch break. Generally, we climb together three times a week which has been great for our physical health, but it’s also been wonderful of our relationship. It’s brought us closer together.
Later this year, we’re going to be facing a number of changes which will be challenging to our relationship. As I wrote previously, my word of the year is focus, and our relationship goals go right along with the word. With the changes taking place, we will need to focus on keeping communication lines open and spending quality time together.
Our time together needs to be purposeful rather than passive. While there is nothing wrong with doing different things while hanging out together in the same area, but we also need to make sure that we’re paying attention to each other’s needs and truly listening to what is going on in the other person’s life. We need to stay connected to keep our relationship strong.
Doing things together. Taking an interest in my husband’s hobbies and him taking an interest in my hobbies. Helping each other with chores. Encouraging each other. Lifting each other up. All of these things will help us stay connected, help us grow together as a couple, and help us achieve that happily every after marriage.
This year, as you look at all of your various goals. Don’t forget about your relationship with your spouse. Set aside time to talk about your goals, your dreams. Make a plan to grow your relationship. Have an item in your home and at work that reminds you to focus on your spouse. Unlike in the movies, happily ever after doesn’t just happen. It takes time, energy, patience, forgiveness, and love.
Congrats on 20 years! What a lovely canvas – I can see why you adore it. You are right on about the open communication and spending time together…whatever you can do makes a major difference, I think.
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Thank you! The canvas looks even better in person.
Heather L recently posted..Focus – 2017 Word of the Year
Congrats on 20year. We will be celebrating 25 years of marriage on Wednesday. I am pretty exacted about that.
Congrats on 25 years! That is awesome!
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Such a great idea! We are celebrating 40 years of marriage this summer. All your ideas as sound ones. Communication is key in a good marriage.
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Wow! 40 years? That is awesome. Congrats!!
Heather L recently posted..Focus – 2017 Word of the Year
Twitter: faded_spring
Wow that is literally goals congrats on finding your soul mate and reminding us to not take our partners for granted. Beautiful message and happy soon to be 20 year anniversary x
Thank you. 🙂
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Congratulations on such a milestone especially in today’s climate. I agree with you that we should pay attention to our spouses
Wow 20 years! That is just awesome! You guys have learned so much about each other and have come a long way! I hope my relationship will last just as long and of course my marriage (whenever that happens!) 🙂
Never rush into a relationship. It’s better to not be in a relationship than to be in the wrong relationship. Wishing you the best in finding the perfect person for you.
Heather L recently posted..Focus – 2017 Word of the Year
This is such a beautiful post. Congrats on close to 20 years. That is lovely to hear and I love that you want purposefulness in your relationship. I am coming up on 11 years with my husband and sometimes it’s hard to find good role models to look up to!
Thank you. Congrats on 11 years of marriage! I’m all about celebrating solid, lasting marriages. 🙂
Heather L recently posted..Focus – 2017 Word of the Year
I love what you said about your time together needing to be purposeful and not passive. Wishing you another 20+ years of happiness.
Twitter: themummytoolbox
Aww this is lovely! I agree we need to focus on our relationship more, which can be quite difficult when you have kids! Thanks for the reminder
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Congrats on 20 years! Next month is my husband and my 10th wedding anniversary and I can hardly believe that myself, 20 will be amazing! Heres to another 20!
This is such a sweet post! You’re right about marriage not being easy- long term relationships know all of the trials and tribulations but like you said it’s all about working and communicating and putting your relationship first.
Twitter: EverydayMomRach
Congratulations on 20 years of marriage! That’s a real milestone. We are on our 8th year but sometimes it feels like 20.
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20 years is a fantastic achievement! Congratulations! We’re at 10 years! I agree – marriage is a lot of work and you have to keep investing time and effort but the payout is worth it!
Twitter: almstindianwife
Congrats on making it 20 years! I love seeing how many years people have been married. My hubby and I just hit our 7 year and I love it.
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Twitter: koreandoll
As a military wife and blogger who could barely handle her busy schedule I am truly glad I came across your post. Congratulations on your 20 years of Journey together! This is very helpful for those who wants to improve their relationship and strengthen their bond to their spouse. Thank you so much!
Twitter: planningmagic2
20 years! I would love to be there one day. Congratulations, must be the communication!
Congratulations on your milestone! I love when you say that your time together should be purposeful and not passive. Too many couples take their time together, and in turn, EACH OTHER, for granted. We never know how long we have on this earth and should treasure each other.
Congratulations on 20 years! Here is to 20 more and much more. Love like this is to live on through the tests of time.
Twitter: asseenonjean
You’re definitely right! Congratulations on 20 years 🙂 I’ve been with my husband for 11 years, but married for just 1. Like you, I feel that we went through a lot before getting married so completely knew that marriage was for us. I am so grateful to have him in my life <3
Congrats to the 20 years of marriage such a real milestone, more happiness to come and stay Stronger than before, I’m inspired with this post
Love this and congrats on 20 years of marriage! That is a huge accomplishment, and it sounds like you are both taking appropriate steps to make it 20+ years more! Congrats! These are great reminders of daily things that we can do to make our marriage better! <3
Congratulations! That is really impressive, considering we all grow and change over the years. I hope we make it to 20!
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Beautiful canvas! Congrats on almost 20 years of marriage – that’s an amazing accomplishment!! What a beautiful relationship!
Twitter: townsendhouse1
Purposeful rather than passive – that is a great way to put it! Congrats on 20 years! That is amazing! My husband and I have been together since he was a junior in high school. It is crazy to think of that!
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I love that you guys set relationship goals! Congrats on the 20 year milestone. Climbing together definitely sounds like a fun hobby!
Twitter: stylesprinter
Wow 20 years is such a long term! Congrats on your loving relationships! Wishing you many more wonderful years together!
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